River: Howlers MC Read online

  He was a monster and he was losing control.

  He had to get things in order and to do that he had to think. Who the fuck could lead the club after him? They were all screwed up. Every single one of them depended on River to hold them together.

  How would they deal with Lucian’s council when it came into power or the choices Lucian would offer the Howlers?

  The snap of a twig caught his attention and then a scent on the breeze.

  Fear, pain, and something else…

  He looked up at the pale face that hid in the trees and something hit him, something he hadn’t felt since childhood.

  Peace.

  3

  She was drawn to the fire. She couldn’t fight it, maybe she didn’t want to. She was so cold and the man seemed harmless enough and she knew evil, could feel it and here, in the glow of the fire, she felt only warmth.

  She wouldn’t ask him to help her, wouldn’t put him in that kind of danger. Being this close was probably costing him his life, but she was so cold and she hadn’t eaten since she’d ran from Ben and she’d lost count of how long that had been.

  “Come on out. I’m not going to hurt you.”

  She heard the truth in his words, but didn’t understand how. She just knew he was telling the truth. She felt it.

  Odd.

  She didn’t move. His eyes found her and she didn’t know how, it was pitch black out there in the forest and the light from the fire didn’t reach her hiding spot, but still his eyes remained steady on her.

  “You’re hurt. I can help you, but it’s got to be your choice.”

  His voice rang with sincerity again and made something inside her calm.

  “What will it cost me?” She was proud of the strength in her voice.

  “Not a damn thing.” She watched a flash of anger cross his face and his shirt bunch as he crossed his massive arms over his chest and sat there like he didn’t have a care in the world. She could refuse and walk away and she didn’t feel that he would even chase her.

  “Everything costs something.” She whispered, but he heard her.

  “Not this time Princess. Call it paying it forward. Somebody helped me once, I’m paying it back, you do the same down the road and we will be square.”

  She stepped out of the shadows and limped toward the fire, keeping it between her and the man who felt so much bigger than the form sitting beside the fire.

  “I just want a little warmth. I’ll go on in a few minutes.”

  His eyes ran over her, but not in the way of Ben’s guards. This man assessed her. She had a sense that he knew more about her in that glance than Ben had figured out in the years she’d belonged to him. She would bet he knew her weaknesses with that one look and knowing it terrified her.

  “Got some food and a first aid kit in my pack. I’d like to help, but if you want me to stay here I will.” He nodded his head toward a large pack of supplies that sat between them.

  She watched as his nostrils flared and his jaw hardened. “I’d like you to get that first aid kit at least.” He let out a breath and searched her face. “What are you?”

  His eyes flashed in the firelight like those of an animal. She knew eyes like that and they didn’t mean help, they meant pain. They always meant pain. Shifters were evil, all of them...except… the guard had helped her so maybe...but it wasn’t worth the risk.

  Her breath caught and she backed away slowly. “Nnno...I’m fine… Th...thank you...I’ll…”

  He stood and approached her slowly with his hands out as if calming a wild animal.

  “Easy now. I’m not going to hurt you.” His voice was low and sent a shiver of warmth over her body.

  “Nnnno...I’ll be fine…I need to go.”

  She watched him wince. “I can feel your pain. Listen to my voice. Listen. I won’t hurt you. I know you can hear it. Trust yourself. You need help.”

  His words felt calm as they ran over her. She wanted to believe him so bad, wanted to feel that there was someone in the world that was good.

  She felt her chest tighten.

  “I will never hurt you. You can feel the truth in my words. Listen to yourself.” His voice was so calm, so kind.

  She found herself drifting toward the sleeping bag, sinking to the softness it offered as if she were sleepwalking.

  He lifted the first aid kit and showed her as he walked toward her. He knelt in the dirt and tugged her slippers off, one at a time. He winced as her sock stuck to the dried blood on her foot.

  “I’m sorry.” She could feel his sorrow as if it were her own.

  How long had it been since someone had cared for her? How long had it been since she’d been seen as a person?

  Tears clogged her throat and she bit down on her lip.

  “It isn’t bad.” She whispered through tears.

  His eyes lifted to hers and his thumb caressed her foot. “I think you’ve been hurt enough. I don’t want to add to it.”

  His eyes were searching as they looked at her. She shivered, wanted to run, wanted to hide. She couldn’t let him see. If he knew how weak she was she would be lost.

  She took a deep breath and forced herself to sit straighter.

  “It isn’t that bad.” She said in a stronger voice and tried to pull her foot away. He held her in a gentle, but firm grasp.

  “I’m going to clean this and then I’m going to pull some wool socks on your feet and then I’m going to feed you. I won’t hurt you. I won’t keep you from leaving after that, but I will offer you help.” His eyes were on her foot. “It is healing, but not fast so whatever you are isn’t helping you all that much.”

  He was puzzled by her, but no more than she was. She wasn’t animal, but she wasn’t completely human either. She was just odd.

  His eyes searched her face as if he was looking for something.

  “What?” She asked and looked away, pushing her dark hair behind her ear.

  “What the hell are you?” He whispered.

  “I... I don’t know.” She whispered brokenly. She knew that Ben held those answers, but he never shared them with her. She couldn’t even remember her name. “I don’t know anything.”

  He closed his eyes and inhaled. “It doesn’t matter. You’re still safe. Let me help you. Then, maybe you can figure it all out.”

  She shook her head hard. If she let him help her, they would kill him.

  “It isn’t safe… They will kill you for helping me.” She started to push to her feet, but he stopped her.

  His smile flashed in the fire light. “I can take care of anything that’s chasing you. You are safe with me and if you let me help you, you’ll never have to worry about anything again.” His eyes were warm and held so many promises.

  “I can’t risk anyone else getting hurt.”

  His eyes flashed and she knew something lurked there, but not what she was used to. He felt dominant, powerful, but he didn’t feel dangerous. His presence, instead made her feel safe.

  “Stay.”

  She couldn’t take her eyes from his as he waited for her answer. His thumb rubbed her skin, warming her.

  She nodded. “Ok.”

  “Good girl.” He helped her pull off her sodden coat. It was ripped and did little to protect her from the cold. He tugged off his own and wrapped her in it like a child in a blanket.

  It was warm and smelled of him and for the first time in her life, she felt safe.

  “Will you tell me your name?” He said in that low voice that made her mind go all mushy.

  “I don’t remember it. He called me something, but it’s not really my name.” She looked up in time to see the pain in his eyes. “I’m sorry, I can’t remember.”

  “It doesn’t matter. You can pick one when you figure one out. That is the least of our worries right now. Rest and heal for now.”

  He gave her a sad smile and it stopped the flutters in her chest. He didn’t think she was a freak, he didn’t think she was stupid, he just accepted her.


  “River is a pretty name.” She whispered. The comment seemed to please him, his eyes lit up with an inner happiness that seemed foreign somehow.

  “My mama named me River. She loved all things earthy.” He chuckled. “She named me for her favorite thing. She used to sit by that river and read to me or tell me stories. Her daddy was a medicine man and she’d spent her life outside. She felt safer there than she did on our house.”

  She was drifting off, but she caught the hint of sadness in his voice.

  “Are you an only child?” She asked drowsily.

  “No. I had a sister.” His voice was so sad it broke her heart, but sleep tugged her under and exhaustion caught up with her.

  4

  River watched the woman as she slept. He could feel something lurking inside her, something monstrous, but he knew she didn’t understand it. She was terrified and that confused him. Why would someone as powerful as this woman be afraid? The bastards following her were nothing she couldn’t handle, but for some reason, she was terrified of them.

  Oh, he felt the dangers in the forest. There was a wall of darkness and it was headed toward them, but she pulsed with power.

  It made no damned sense.

  Why the hell was she so afraid?

  He caught a scent on the air, one that made his wolf snarl.

  panther.

  “Fuck.” He tugged his phone from the holster at his belt.

  He was too far from home to call the brothers. The only allies that were close by were the damned coyotes and hated asking them for help.

  He cursed as he pulled up Creed’s number and connected the call.

  He would never live this down.

  “Creed.” The deep voice rumbled over the line and for some reason just that made River’s wolf bristle.

  “Need a little help friend.” River made the last word sarcastic.

  “Damn, let me drop everything and run right over.” There was an edge to Creed’s voice even as he kept it light. There was no love lost between them. They were allies and Creed had helped them more than most would, but it got under River’s skin the way he helped the monsters.

  “Look you crazy fuck. It’s no secret that I hated making this call, but I have a woman here, hurt and she’s not human and I’ve got the scent of panther on the air.”

  “Fuck. Yeah ok. Where are you?” Creed dropped the sharp edge to his voice. He was a dick, but he had a heart for those in pain and he would go to great lengths to help someone in need.

  “I’ll send it…” River waited for the information to send and heard Creed bark orders to his pack.

  “We can be there in an hour. How many do you need?”

  “I need a van to get her the hell out of here and I need clean up to erase our scents.” River answered. “This shit can’t follow us.”

  “Already on the way. Sit tight, we will come rescue your ass.”

  “What will it cost me?” River growled.

  “Just do something for me someday.”

  “Fucking mercenary. What do you want?” River growled.

  “Nothing, fuck. Why can’t you understand this? I just want us to help each other. You called, I’m helping...I call, you help me too. It’s not a payback, just the fucking right thing to do for a friend.”

  River snorted. “Friend...right…”

  “Is this woman worth it?” Creed sighed.

  River wanted to curse. Creed was a calculating son of a bitch and if he understood how important this woman felt, the favor would be bigger.

  “She’s just a woman.” He growled and cringed when Creed laughed like an idiot.

  “Yeah, and my dick is just an appendage. Sit tight, I’m on my way...and River…”

  “What?”

  “We are going to be friends.”

  The line went dead and River cursed low. He hated asking anyone for help, but asking Creed really stuck in his crawl. Creed had an agreement with the Monsters and one of the worst was Driskell himself.

  River breathed out the hatred he felt for his father and the confusion the whole situation filled him with. He’d come out here to find an answer… his eyes fell to the woman curled in his sleeping bag. He had a feeling he’d found something else.

  River let her sleep as he cleaned up his camp. He still smelled panther and it was getting closer, but he didn’t think they would find him before Creed arrived.

  She made a small sound in her sleep and he felt his jeans tighten.

  “Sick fucking animal. She’s been hurt and all you can do is lust after her. You aren’t good enough for a woman like that.”

  His chest vibrated with a snarl, but he swallowed it down. His animal was fighting him hard, wanting to hunt down the men chasing her, but damn it, he didn’t even know her name.

  None of it made a lick of sense.

  5

  She was floating. She felt so warm and safe that she didn’t even open her eyes when she felt her body lift from the ground. She felt breath on her ear and knew, just knew, it was him, River.

  “Just rest princess, you’re safe now.”

  She could feel his honesty; his complete assurance and she took it. She held it close to her heart and decided to keep it, even if it turned out to be false.

  She heard other voices and stiffened.

  “Shhhh. It’s alright. They’re friends, here to help me keep you safe.”

  His voice ran over her like the heat of a fire. It crackled over her skin and made her press closer even if she knew she’d get burned.

  “Just some woman my hairy ass.” She heard, but didn’t care to think what the new voice meant.

  “Shut the fuck up Creed.” River snarled and the sound of his chest vibrating didn’t scare her like it should have. She felt protected by whatever beast lived in his middle and she knew there was one, she could smell him, but she didn’t know what he was. She inhaled and smelled the other man too. He was different, but still he didn’t feel evil like the men she’d been around. She relaxed against River’s chest.

  “Who is she Riv?” The man’s voice lowered. “That scent… I can’t place it.”

  “I don’t know, but she feels important.” his arms tightened around her.

  “Is she in control? Whatever she is will leave a mark if she changes in the van.”

  “I don’t think she can. I don’t think she knows how, but she is stronger than she looks.”

  She didn’t fight the warmth that spread through her at the sound of his words. She hadn’t felt important in too long to remember and especially not by someone who didn’t know what she was.

  “Is she purring?”

  The amusement in the words cut deep and she cringed away. The snarl that ripped from River’s chest should have been terrifying, but it wasn’t.

  “Easy Riv. Easy. He didn’t mean anything by it.”

  “Keep that son of a bitch away from her Creed.”

  “He’s here to clean up, you know Breaker. He can erase her scent, yours too. Easy. She’s seen enough. You can smell the hurt on her. Don’t give her any more. Don’t do that to her.”

  The man, Creed, spoke in a soothing voice and she felt River relax.

  “Let’s get her to Lost Lakes. She’ll be safe there. Daisy will take good care of her.”

  River’s arms tightened. “She stays with me. I’m not sending her within a hundred miles of those fucking caves or the monsters you house there.”

  “That’s fucked up and you know it. I can keep her safe. She’s being hunted River. I smell them too. Whoever she is, she’s important enough to employ fucking panther guards, that spells trouble.”

  She felt River sigh. His breath fluttered across her face and surprisingly, it smelled minty.

  “Let’s just get her out of here. She can decide what she wants when we are all safe. Decision’s not ours to make.”

  She felt him shift and heard a door slam before she opened her eyes.

  He was looking right into hers when she dared to look and she was tr
apped in the crystal blue of them.

  “You need to rest.” His hand lifted to brush her hair out of her face.

  “Will you tell me where we are going?” She whispered.

  “That will be your choice. You can stay with me in Indiana or you can go with Creed to his compound. You will be safe in either place. His is sort of a hippie commune and mine is more of a biker scene, but you will be safe in either place. You will have friends and food, a roof over your head.” His head tilted and he studied her. “It’s a fresh start princess. Either place will give you that, but it’s your life and nobody can tell you what to do with it.”

  Tears leaked from her eyes. “I thought I’d found that, but it didn’t last.”

  He used his thumb to wipe away her tears. “Well, now you have friends to help you with it.” He pulled her in close. “I’d like for you to stay with me, but I won’t hold it against you if you don’t. You are free to make any choice and we can still be friends.”

  She gripped the front of his shirt in her fist. “I want to stay with you.” She whispered.

  “Then that’s settled. You can go on back to sleep now.”

  “They will come for me.” She whispered.

  “Who?” He asked as he stroked a gentle hand through her hair.

  “Benjamin Rockton, my husband...he will never stop looking...he needs me...I’m valuable…”

  “I will never let him take you. You are safe as long as I live. I swear it.”

  She felt the power in his vow. “Then I hope you live forever.”

  She felt his sharp breath when she pressed a kiss to his chest. Sorrow rolled off him in waves, but she didn’t understand it.

  “I think I’ll do just about anything you need me to.” He said and his arms tightened around her.

  “Thank you River. Thank you for all of it. I’ll never be able to repay this.”

  “You’re welcome Princess.” He pressed a kiss to the top of her head and she found herself drifting off into a peaceful sleep in his arms. “You have given me more than I can ever give you.” He kissed her head and whispered so low that she almost missed it. “A reason to face my demons and keep fighting.”